Annoying morning

I got up earlier than usual today as I had another Skype session with my boss who’s in Penang. I reached work early, settled down and got ready for my Skype, only to find that my boss was not online. When I asked my colleague if she was in, I was told that she had gone out and would Skype with me “as soon as she returned”. WTH? I mean, I know she’s the boss, but hello….I’m way over the on other side of the world and with the time difference and all, she could at least be a little more considerate right? At least during our last Skype call, she was online but asked me to wait for awhile (read: 30 minutes) so she could go get coffee. But now…I had to search for her!  

When she finally came online 1.5 hours later, she told me that she was not feeling well and asked to speak to me tomorrow!!! Argh!!!! It spoiled my mood coz I don’t like postponing and postponing things!! Plus, that would mean I have to wake up earlier tomorrow as well! Sighs…!!

Anyway, when I went out to get lunch today, I bumped into a guy (Allan from Uganda) in the elevator. Actually, I didn’t expect anyone to be in the elevator and got a shock when I stepped in.  The poor lighting didn’t help, considering that he was black and wearing a black jacket! We got talking and continued talking all the way till we parted ways. He even gave me his card to contact him so we could have a meal together! :s

Marie didn’t come today presumably coz she’s sick; while my hsemate didn’t go to work coz she too is sick! Then my sister tells me that she is also feeling sick! Must be a bug that’s going around the world!!

My stock of food at home is finishing but nowadays I’m buying stuff in smaller amounts coz I don’t want to have leftovers. In fact, I still have about half a stick of butter that I bought when I first arrived! I also still have a packet of sauce to make broccoli gratin but I can’t use it as my hsemate doesn’t have an over or a microwave; so I’m just going to leave it behind and let her figure out what to do with it. When I first bought it, I had thought that all I needed to do was add water and cook it in a pan; until I Google translated the instructions and the last step was to bake the dish! Haiz!

Anyway, I was home early today. I took a nice hot bath and then had dinner. By the time I did all that, it was…only 8.30pm!! Lol! And I was ready for bed! :D I then just watched TV before hitting the sack.

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Dienstag

It was so hard to get up this morning! I really didn’t want to get out of bed, and I had to force myself! Thankfully, it turns out that I wasn’t the only one who felt like that. Aisling and Marie (trainee) had a hard time getting out of bed too. We all blame it on the weather. In fact, I forgot to mention this yesterday, but my hsemate told me that she heard on the news, that winter this year has been the gloomiest and darkest in 50 years!! It’s not always like this, so dark and gloomy and depressing. People are getting fed up and can’t wait for the sun to come out! I agree!

Time actually passed quite slowly today. I’m not sure why. Every time I happened to glance at my watch, the time didn’t seem to move much since the last I looked. Hmmm….maybe it’s just one of those days. Also, Marie is sick. Joe didn’t come in coz he too is sick. Carolijn is traveling. Then Marie and Albert left early, so the office was real quiet.

I also think the novelty of being in a new place and being the new person has waned. I am looking forward to going home, so I guess my brain is slowly getting me ready for the switch back to normal. I’ve also started thinking about packing. Like I said yesterday, I’ve got my list ready! Still feel like buying a few more stuff but don’t know what! Lol!

I don’t know it it’s too early to be getting ready/thinking of going home, or should I only start feeling this way next week? Nevertheless, I’m not going to let this feeling stop me from enjoying my last weeks here. It’s Marie’s (trainee) birthday this Friday and she’s having a small get together. Already I am excited about that. J

And of course…just as my luck would have it…the day I come home early, have a nice hot shower and am in my PJs while I prepared dinner, my hsemate comes home and introduces me to her son!! Now…I will admit that I am vain but who can blame me for being horrified to be introduced to someone while in my PJs!! And to make matters worse…her son is not bad looking!! Oh God!! Lol! Well thank God that’ll be the first and last time I meet him.

It’s Mittwoch again tomorrow! My second last Mittwoch here. Sighs…

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14 days to go!

As of today, there are officially 14 days left of my trip! That means, 14 days left before I see my family again!! Woo!!!

You know, there is one habit that the Germans here practise that I find amusing: blowing the nose. Yes…during winter our eyes water and our nose starts running as though we have a cold but without the unpleasantness of it being blocked. Now, I was taught that when I sneeze or want to blow my nose, I should do it discreetly. So that’s what I have been doing here. The Germans however, sneeze for all to hear; and when it comes to blowing their noses, it’s as though they turn into elephants to perform that task.

I mean, from the buses to the office to anywhere…people just blow their noses LOUDLY, not worrying or thinking about others around them. Granted, it’s their right to do as they please but isn't it proper manners to sneeze or blow your nose discreetly? Here I am trying to be polite so that I don’t sound disgusting when I blow my nose; but there they are, blowing their nose as though they’re playing an instrument!

Anyway, I made a checklist of the things I need to pack for my trip back. For those of you who know me, I always have a list for stuff: groceries, what to pack, what to do etc. I left the notebook that I had used to write down the list I used while packing for this trip at home, that’s why I have to come up with a new list. Shouldn't be too difficult since I’m heading home, and so I can just pack almost everything and leave behind stuff that is finishing or that is of no use i.e. my broken boots.

Being in Germany, I've been able to help a friend’s aunt, who is facing some legal family issues. She’s going through a divorce; and being a Malaysian with not much contacts or help in this country, she’s having a tough time. My friend asked me if I could help her (she’s based in Frankfurt) and so I called and talked to her, got a gist of what her situation is like and then proceeded to talk to my colleague, Anna, asking for her advice. It’s so good to be working in an organization full of lawyers, especially when there is a problem like this. There is immediate concern and help at hand. J I’m not sure how much we can help her but we did put her in contact with a lawyer who is based in Frankfurt and hopefully, things will work out well in the end.

I had a nearly 2 hour chat with my hsemate today. Since I didn't see her during the weekend, she came to say hello, and from then on, our conversation ran from what I did during the weekend to how fast time has flown, to how different the family systems are between Europe and Asia, to how difficult it is for men to change etc. A person needs at least an hour to spare once a conversation with her starts. Now I’m not being mean or anything but she does tend to go around the bush and by the time she thinks in German and speaks in English, time just flies.

So that was today. Some of the people from the office will be leaving to India tomorrow, so the office is going to be quite quiet for a week. Hmmm…

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Week 7

Week 7 begins and it doesn’t look like the weather is improving. Lol! I guess I’m fated to go home while there is still snow falling. I just hope it doesn’t delay my flight!

I woke up at 8.30am and just lazed around. I Googled to double check if the flea market would indeed be open today; and according to the website, it would be opened at 10am and last till 4pm. So I had plenty of time. I basically lazed around in my PJs, while I had my breakfast, did laundry and browsed the net.

At 10.30am when I looked out the window, I had a beautiful view of falling snow. Yes…instead of the snow twirling around, seeming to come from the ground up like the last time, today, the snow was actually falling down. I actually spent a few minutes just gazing out the window, watching the snow fall, trying to mentally capture the moment and image coz in two weeks’ time, this will all just be a memory.

In the end, I didn’t go to the flea market! Yes…such a waste, I know but I was just too lazy to get all dressed up and then walk in the snow and in the cold. Plus, I don’t know where the flea market is, so that would entail me looking for the place and if I’m lucky, finding it. Instead, I stayed home and ate pasta with tomato-mozzarella soup. Warm and comforting food. I also chatted with my sis and got the latest gossip from home. J

I went for a walk in the early evening. I went to buy a slice of cake and bread. Then when I reached home, I made hot chocolate while I enjoyed my slice of cake. I watched the Cosby Show and Ellen on Youtube till it was nearly 11pm.

I start my second last week at work tomorrow. I have 11 working days left, March 11^th being my last working day though I doubt I’ll work that day. I’ve got two weekends left to do what I want. Right now, I can’t really think of what else I want to do coz I feel as though I have done enough and I am happy and contented. Anything extra would be a bonus.

I guess I will just take each day as it comes and enjoy it to the fullest. J

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Concentration Camp

I was so hoping for good weather today as we were going to visit a concentration camp. When I woke up…it was snowing and the temperature was -4C!! My first thought was “Oh no! Is anyone going to come? And is it possible to walk the grounds in this weather?”! But by the time I changed and had my breakfast, it had stopped snowing and I started to feel positive. I also wondered whether it was the Universe’s way of telling me that since I am visiting the camp, I should experience it, almost as how the prisoners there lived. Almost. 

It was snowing slightly when I left the apartment, and it was cold. I took the metro by myself, changed stations and trains and managed to find our meeting point. J In the end, only four of us met up: Marie, Carolijn, Claudia and me. The others pulled out at the last minute coz one was sick and another had a really late night.

The train ride to Birkenwerder took about 30-40 minutes and we spent the whole time talking about everything under the sun. And then, it was another 20 minutes bus ride to another stop; and then….it was another 2kms to the Sachsenhausen Camp. Believe it or not, we WALKED that 2kms but it was not that cold and as we were all excited, I guess adrenalin took over.

When we reached the camp area, we headed to the information center to get the audio guides and maps. Then it was a walk down Camp Street, where the prisoners had to walk through before reaching the actual camp ground. Back then, there were no walls and so the public could actually see them walking. Women and children threw stones and shouted profanity at them. I can only imagine how the prisoners felt!

There was also a museum for the Oranienburg Concentration Camp there (this camp is often confused with the Sachsenhausen camp); but it was on a much smaller scale with no actual buildings or structures. It was just a normal museum. But small and normal, we actually spent an hour in there!

After that…it was time to enter the gates to hell! Of course, just at the entrance gate, there are the famous words of the camp, “Arbeit Macht Frei” which means, "labour makes (you) free". Sickening right? I mean, it’s a concentration camp where people hardly survived, the workload being one of the reasons for the deaths!! Marie told me that in some other camps, there are phrases such as “because you deserve this” on the gates!! Sickening!!

The first thing that hit me when I entered the gates was how big the area was. Granted, there are not many structures left and so the grounds were bare. Nevertheless, that sight actually made me flinch. Walking the grounds from one area to another, in the freezing weather (somehow, with the lack of buildings around, the wind, snow and cold seemed worse), with my hands frozen to the point that I could not feel them, and with the wind just threatening to blow me off my feet, I had only one thought running through my mind: “How did they live? Especially without proper clothing, food, shoes etc.” This thought kept running in my head that I really couldn't think of anything else.

There was not much of an opportunity to take pictures because there was nothing much to capture. The important stuff is in a building where no cameras are allowed. When Claudia asked if I wanted a picture of me in the area, I said no. It didn't feel right doing such a thing: smiling and posing in an area where so much horror happened. People might say that I’m stupid for not taking a picture of myself in the area; but to me, having been IN the area and seeing and sort of experiencing (read: the cold) what the prisoners went through, that’s a "picture" worth more than one in a camera.

As we were walking towards the exit of the camp, I saw a sign that said “Neutral Zone”; and I wondered “what the hell was it doing here?!” I mean, seriously??? I just had to take a picture of that!! Just before I passed through the gates, “escaping” or rather leaving behind the camp area, I took one last look and tried to imagine the place as it was back then: with buildings and vehicles, the smells and sounds, and of course, the people, both dead and alive. Sighs…this was not Auswitch and yet…sighs. And I just learned that there were actually 3 Auzwitch camps, not one as I thought!!

We spent nearly 3 hours there and yet, we did not see everything! It was just TOO cold. It’s a pity that we didn't get to see everything but I am happy that I visited the camp no matter how little time we spent there. I guess it’ll take more than one trip to fully internalize what happened all those years back; but then again, I don’t think it’s possible to understand and accept that such atrocities were done to human, by humans. I don’t think I will ever really understand how such a thing could have happened.

This visit evoked more emotion in me than when I visited the Wall. I tried hard to imagine living in a city that was divided; yet somehow, I just couldn't grasp the emotion needed to understand how it felt to be living in one state governed by two totally different systems. Sighs…

As we were heading back towards Berlin, I mentioned to Claudia that I was wondering how the people in that town feels about living in a place so near the camp area. And she told me that, people tend to ignore or be in denial that such things ever happened. In fact, back then, even though people knew what was happening in that camp, people just kept quiet and kept to themselves. She said it would be interesting to interview someone from that period and listen to their thoughts. Hmmm…

In order to get over the unforgettable emotions, I went souvenir shopping after the four of us said goodbye. I got a few things for my family but I still feel like I need to buy more! Lol! Next weekend would be my last time to shop coz the weekend after that will be spent packing!

Wow….16 days left! I’m hoping to go to a flea market tomorrow. That is if I am not lazy and if it’s not snowing! J Otherwise, I’ll just stay in bed!

What a day it was! 

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3rd last Friday

As the title shows, it’s my 3^rd last Friday here, which means I have another 17 more days before my loooong journey back. I’m not looking forward to sitting in a plane for more than 10 hours, what more having to change planes twice and a transit of 4 hours before I can see Penang again!

I’ve been getting up tired these last few days; not sure why. I sleep fairly early, before midnight, so it’s not as though I’m not getting enough sleep or rest. But then again, it could be the fact that I just want to snuggle under the warmth of my covers and not go outside. J

It was -3C this morning! Brrr….my hands have started to freeze again. L And I felt slightly under the weather today.

By the way, did I mention that there is a Janet Jackson look-alike on the bus that I take to work? The first time I saw her, I did a double take. And then, every time after that, I found myself being on the same bus as her! I am so tempted to approach her and tell her about her similarity to MJ’s sister but she has an unfriendly face, so I better not do that.

There was a talk today at work. The speaker was Peter Weiss (born 1925, in Vienna, Austria – he fled to before the Germans came) and he is one of the most recognized and innovative human rights lawyers worldwide. He is Vice President of the Center for Constitutional Rights (CCR) in New York, with which he has been associated with for forty years, and a prominent member of the National Lawyers Guild, a radical lawyers’ association. During his long and prolific career, he has been involved with the campaign to rid the world of nuclear weapons, and is President of the Lawyers Committee on Nuclear Policy and Vice President and former President of IALANA (International Association of Lawyers against Nuclear Arms). Moreover, he is a member of the Executive Committee of Americans for Peace Now, which advocates a just peace in the Middle East. In the past, he served as President of the American Committee on Africa and as Chairman of the Board of the Institute for Policy Studies in Washington.

He was also the principal author of the draft brief on the illegality of threat or use of nuclear weapons used by many countries in making written submissions to the International Court of Justice in the 1996 nuclear weapons advisory opinion, and served as counsel to Malaysia at the hearings. When he spoke about this, my boss here introduced me (as a visitor from Malaysia) and the crowd actually applauded when they learned about my work. The way my boss spoke of my work sounded so noble and important. Lol! Not that it’s not important but you know what I mean…J ! (My boss chose to introduce me at the exact same moment that I took a bite out of a pastry! It was supposed to be a lunch talk but by 2.30pm, no one was eating. I took a pastry after I saw Bibiana eating. Anyway, I managed to avoid being terribly embarass as everyone was understanding and just laughed; later on, Carolijn said that I’m such a charming person, that no one else could have gotten away with that scene as graciously as I did. Aww…). He came with his wife who is such a lovely lady and she told me that Malaysian officials at UN events don’t even know about the nuclear talks that Peter Weiss was hired to do. I told her these issues don’t usually reach the public and only stays at the level that the government think is important.

Sighs…I’m kind of glad it’s Freitag; although I will not be sleeping in tomorrow as I’ll be going to the Sachsenhausen Concentration Camp. I’m really excited and I hope I feel better tomorrow. Christoph said that this camp is much smaller than Auschwitz, and does not have much of the real buildings left; nevertheless, I’m still going coz it’s a once in a lifetime opportunity to see these places and try to grasp the horrors that went on.

Oh…I also called my mum. It’s her birthday tomorrow (23^rd Feb) and so when I called her at 5pm my time, she was just ushering in her birthday. She told me that there were only 6 people with her at the shop and she loved it that it was such a small group. J

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p.s. Just as I was going to upload this, the electricity went off!! I knocked on my hsemate’s door and there was no answer. So I called her handphone and she was actually sleeping. She told me to wait for a few minutes! After 10 minutes, she got out of her room and lit two candles, giving me one and taking the other for herself. She said it sometimes happens but not always. She acted like it’s normal!! Thank God it came back after 20 minutes or so. 

COLD day

Like I said in my entry yesterday, I expected to get up to everything covered in snow today. Instead, there was no snow; in fact, when I got up, I saw the sun peeping through the clouds. By the time I was ready to leave the apartment, the sun was up and shining!

However…it was snowing ever so slightly and it was COLD!! I think it was like -2C. It felt weird to see the sun up but feeling so cold!

Carolijn and I left the office at around 12.15 to head to my meeting. She was accompanying me as I didn’t know the place. We grabbed lunch on the way. It was horribly cold despite the sun being out; and we had to walk quite a bit!! God…it’s as though the worse days of winter is coming back to say goodbye to me! Lol!  

I missed the human rights cinema show today as I was working on a pre-project description with Claudia. They played Tobacco Girl, a short documentary on the life of a 14 year old child worker in Turkmenistan I think. Sounds interesting from the write up I read online. If the video’s online, I’ll watch it.

So I have officially canceled my trip to London. I told Jemimah; and also since I was suddenly asked to do some research to gather background information for a potential case, I guess it’s better I spend time doing that. Am a bit disappointed but it just means that I will have more money to spend here or take home! :D I’m sure there is a reason why I’m not going, so I’m just going to accept it. No point sulking or being unhappy, especially during my last two weeks here.

I’ve been watching bloopers on line these last few days. They are just soooooooo funny. Then there are the Cosby Show episodes that are sooo hilarious! It’s so nice to be able to watch these old shows and still be able to laugh! :D

Sighs….it’s Freitag again in a couple of hours! My my my…another weekend is approaching. This weekend is exciting however. I’ll be visiting a concentration camp! Can’t wait!

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Mid-week…again!

Just as how it was snowy yesterday, I got up this morning to everything covered in snow; PLUS…it was snowing slightly! I had seriously thought that towards the end of my trip, the weather would be improving and that I would at least see the beginnings of early spring.

As I can’t get over how snowy it has been these last couple of days, I decided to make a short video of what I am experiencing here. I shot the 34 second video from my work table, which has a window directly in front of it, and then posted it on FB. I used Google to check the forecasted weather temperatures, and found that temperatures are expected to drop in the next coming days (to minuses), before going back up in early March. So much for my hope of seeing early spring!

We had another celebration today at the office; this time over coffee and cake as it’s Joe’s birthday. Oh…and after Joe cut his cake, the sun suddenly appeared and there was sun and snow at the same time!! He planned to have drinks tonight and initially, I was planning to go. But then I decided not to. I don’t want to sound or be anti-social, but I just didn’t feel like going. It’s not about not wanting to socialize or being unfriendly, but like I said…I just didn’t feel like going. I’d rather stay home and then come up with an excuse the next day, than force myself to go, smile and pretend to enjoy. Plus, I wanted to wash my hair; and for those of you who remember what happened the last time…!! Also, I have a meeting with a funder tomorrow, and although it is in the afternoon, I would like to be fresh and alert (not that I would be drunk if I had gone).

Anyway, as it’s already Wednesday and I have yet to buy my ticket to London or even book my accommodation, I have decided to cancel the trip. The prices of the tickets are increasing every day. Even if I had a credit card to buy my own ticket, I would still need help in getting accommodation there as I was supposed to stay at the Malaysian Hall, which is usually for students. I guess I’m not fated to go after all. Perhaps, it’s the Universe’s way of telling me that I’ll go there another time. Who knows? I’ll just use those days to visit places that I have yet to visit in Berlin, like Kaufhaus des Westens (KaDeWe), Berlin’s most famous trademark department store– or department store of the West. It is Berlin’s shopping paradise, a favourite, and easy to spot landmark. With 60,000sqm, the equivalent of nine football fields, 380,000 articles, 40,000 visitors a day, this is the legendary, largest department store on the continent (although some say Harrods in London is bigger).

Well…I’m pretty sure I’m going to wake up to snow covered things again; and also have the “pleasure” of walking through the snow. Let’s see whether I’m right…

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Snow and Wind

I once again slept early last night. I had nothing to do online and there was nothing to watch on TV. So I turned on the radio and listened to music till I fell asleep.

I woke up earlier this morning as I had a Skype call at 9.30am with my boss back in Penang and I didn’t want to be late. There was snow and wind this morning; and my first thought was “I hope I’ll be able to walk straight if the wind blew!” Lol! Turns out, it was drizzling and as some of the snow had melted, the walkways were wet and slippery!!! Instead of worrying about the wind, I had to worry about not slipping and falling on my butt.

When I reached the office, there was no one around! Granted, it was only 8.50am; but up till 10am, and still no one was around!! I had my Skype which lasted 22 minutes; half way through it, then only people started coming in!!

As my time here slowly comes to an end, I realized that I haven’t been to a flea market or second-hand shop. Berlin is said to be famous for these places. But I suppose with my weekdays filled with work and weekends with sightseeing, I have justification. Bibiana still wants to go to at least one flea market with me but I’m wondering when since the flea markets only open on Sundays. I guess I don’t need to go to a second hand shop here as I don’t intend on buying any clothing back. Plus…as I’m now starting to worry about excess baggage, I’m being careful about what souvenirs to bring home. Although I said I am willing to pay for the excess baggage, but still…to pay say Euro100 for an excess of 2 kilos?

Anyway…it started snowing quite heavily after lunch! All of a sudden, it was as though someone released bags and bags of miniscule cotton balls!! Funny thing was, the snow was flying UPWARDS because of the wind!! And then….about 15 minutes later, the sun came out!! And then is snowed again!! Crazy!! It was snowing off and on, and when I left the office, I felt like I was walking through foam!

With 20 days to go, I’m having mixed feelings. I want to go home and see my family and friends; but at the same time I’m going to be leaving my new friends with a heavy heart. Somehow, I just know that will not be in touch with some of them, and that is sad. Sighs…

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Montag

I have exactly 21 days left of my stay here! Another 3 Mondays and I’ll be spending my last few hours in Berlin with my new friends and colleagues. Sighs…I really cannot believe how time have just flown by. One minute I’m super-homesick, counting the days to when I would be leaving; and the next minute, I’m counting how many days left I have!!

So I didn’t go for the movie cinema thing yesterday where they watched a Indian movie; and today, my colleagues were talking about it, saying how loooong it was, how at times they were confused and that they couldn’t stand the singing and shouting. Lol! I told them it was all normal for an Indian movie. Hahahaha!

I went to lunch with Annelen today. We had Thai food. The owner or at least manager looked Indian; and then, when we were leaving, he asked me where I was from. When I said Malaysia, he was soooooooo happy. Then he asked if I was Indian, and when I said yes, he was overjoyed!!! Then he spoke to me in Tamil, asking me why I was here, how long I will be here and if I was ok here!! J People in India didn’t believe my Indian roots; and here, everyone can see it. J

As soon as we arrived back from lunch, the staff were having cake and champagne to celebrate the birth of Albert’s daughter (he’s the office manager). In my first week here, they had 3 celebrations, all with cake and champagne; so much so that Claudia and Clod felt the need to tell me that they are all not alcoholics!! Lol! I think it’s good practice, as it’s not only a break from work but also a sort of team building/solidarity exercise. J During this time, my colleagues asked me about my weekend with my hsemate and they all think she’s a bit of a fuddy-duddy. Lol! Personally, I didn’t mean to sound ungrateful or that she’s bad, but I guess her insistence of me going to the blind home and later wanting to see pictures of home was unusual to them. I told them that she’s not THAT bad but it did feel weird coz after all her “warnings” about not liking to baby sit, here she is taking me out. :s

Today passed real fast. It seemed that I had just stepped into the office and the next minute, it was time to go home.

My trip to London is still up in the air. Jemimah is busy preparing her 4000-word essay that is due tomorrow, so she’s replying to my messages quite late. I’m worried as I’ve been monitoring the flight costs and it has been increasing. I expected this as the travel period is next week! But I can’t buy the tickets myself coz first, I don’t have a credit card; and two, I need her to book my accommodation etc as she’ll be the one taking me around. Anyway, I’ll wait till Wed and see how it is. It’ll be a waste if I can’t make the trip; but I won’t die if I don’t go. Sighs…L

On another note, it looks like my plan to visit a concentration camp this Saturday is panning out. I’m excited at the same time wary; after all, it is a place where thousands of people died! :s

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L 

Quiet Sunday

I didn’t have anything planned for today, so when I woke up at 8.45a.m., I took my time doing everything. I didn’t immediately go and bathe; but I did brush my teeth, wash my face etc. I decided that I would laze around in my PJs while I read the news online, browsed FB and also chatted with my sister.

Bibiana was supposed to text me yesterday about our plans to go to a flea market today; but she didn’t, so I Googled to find the flea markets. The nearest one to me opens irregularly and no thanks to my luck, that flea market will only open next Sunday. The other few that I found are quite far and since I really don’t want to get lost, I decided not to go. Also, I wasn’t sure if it’s worth it to go since it’s winter and there may not be much stuff. There is another flea market just one stop away and so, I decided to go there. However, I changed my mind later on (reason below).

After deciding that I would go to the flea market that is just one stop away, as it was still early, I cleaned my room. I swept, vacuumed and tidied the place. After that, I went to take a shower. Here is why I decided not to go to the flea market. Thinking that I had all the time in the world, I decided to take a long bath and wash my hair at the same time. BAD IDEA!! Today’s morning bath was the worst bath I have had since arriving!! The hot water kept going off, shocking me by the sudden change of water temperature! Imagine…one minute hot and the next FREEZING!!! My hsemate had warned me when I first arrived that this sometimes happens but not regularly. It’s a problem that she’s tried to fix but no one knows what’s wrong. I’ve experienced this problem about 2-3 times but it was no big deal coz it was towards the end of my bath anyway.

But today…the hot water went off at least 4 times!! And all these times, I had to wait for like 30 seconds (which actually felt like 10 minutes)!! Towards the end, I was shivering despite getting to finish my shower with hot water. By the time I went into my room and changed, I was sort of pissed off. Plus, my stomach was growling. And so…coming back to my trip to the flea market, I decided I would stay in the comfort of my warm room and eat some hot food. I “cooked” some pre-made pasta and broccoli and ate the whole thing which was enough for two servings! I just lost the mood to go out and explore. Perhaps next Sunday.

So I stayed home. I chatted with my sister and once again, Skype was a problem. Listening to music was fine but when I talked to my sis, she sounded robotic. Could be due to the internet connection on her side as it was raining heavily in Penang. Hmmm…

I went for a walk around my area; just so I could get some exercise and fresh air. After all, I know I’m going to miss this place, so I better suck it all in. J

By the way, I forgot to mention that Joe has a twin; and that Marie has a sister who is 4 years older, but people always mistake her as the older one! Haha!!

Repetitive as this may sound, another week has gone; and another begins. Sighs…

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The Wall again!

I woke up at 8.45am today and I heard my hsemate walking around. I wanted to “catch” her and ask her about last night. But then, it’s a Saturday – her off day - and if she wants to avoid me, what can I do? She already told me that she usually just lazes around and sleeps in on weekends. So to be awake at 8.45am on a Saturday and having an EARLY night the day before…make you curious no? But at 10am, she came to greet me and plan for the day! I mentioned that I didn’t see her last night and she told me that she was out. Hmmm…ok.

So we left the apartment at 11am and on the way to a blind home that she wanted me to see, we saw a sort of flea market and decided to browse there before going to the home. She wanted me to see the place and the crafts that they make at the home as she found it impressive. Not only blind people live and work there, but other disabled people as well. I told her that my sister works in a similar place and that they do similar things, but she insisted we should go. So we did; we even had coffee and cake there.

After that, we headed to Checkpoint Charlie - the best known border-crossing of the Cold War days. I got the feeling that she only wanted to show me the place as she was walking quite fast; but I did manage to take a few pictures. When I asked if we were going back and if I could take more pictures (after we were far away…), she said we’ll come back another time for pictures!!! :S Then we headed to Potsdamer Platz - the most striking example of the urban renewal that turned Berlin into the ‘New Berlin’ in the 1990s. We walked through the mall and then went to the Cinemaxx where the Berlinale is happening. There was a red carpet, but no stars as it was still early.

Next, we went to see a church (I don’t know why) and then the Philharmonic place, but that was closed. By then, it was 3pm and so we headed home as my hsemate had to be back by 4pm for another appointment. Instead of going home, I headed to Hermannplatz, where Karstadt is. It’s a warehouse shopping mall and here…I managed to buy souvenirs!!! I’m not done souvenir shopping but still…it’s a start. J

When I was making myself a cup of hot chocolate later in the day, my hsemate came out of her room. She had decided to postpone her appointment again (she was supposed to meet her friend last week) as she felt lazy. So…we spent the evening together, going through photos from Penang; and in turn, she showed me pictures of her home town in Salzburg. Then she Googled some pictures to show me the different landscapes of Germany. :s 

Anyway, one thing that I have noticed since coming here is that, there is no fan or air-conditioning unit. I have always wondered where the fan or air-cond was when I watched movies; and I always told myself that it’s Hollywood and it’s just a movie. But then…when I came here and I asked my hsemate and colleagues, they told me that they do not in fact use fans or air-conds. There is of course the heater for winter and in the other seasons, they just leave their windows open; even when they go to work!! Imagine doing that in Malaysia!! 

Am not really sure what I am going to be doing tomorrow. Maybe I’ll just go for a walk.

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Early morning

It’s Freitag and I was supposed to have a meeting at 8.30am!! It was supposed to be at 9am, but we moved it earlier coz Robert was leaving today and he wanted to do some sightseeing. No doubt the meeting was only a half-hour earlier, but still…that’s a half hour of sleep that I missed! Lol! However….when I reached the office, I was the only one there!! No one had come in yet!! And by 9am, the meeting still hadn’t started coz Robert was still not in!! The meeting only started at 9.30am but it was a productive one, so no complains. J

The weekend is once again here and I can’t help but think of the remaining weekends that I have left. On my second last weekend here, I have been thinking of going to London. However, Jemimah is taking quite awhile to reply to my messages, plus she has a paper due the day after I plan to leave London. To be fair, I told her to let me know if it’ll really be a problem and that it’s ok to tell me no. After all, studies must come first and I don’t want her feeling worried about her paper just because she has to accompany me around.

Joe’s birthday is next Wednesday and he’s turning 26. Bibiana is also 26 and I found out that Marie, another trainee is only 23 this year! That’s Vay’s age! They are all younger than me!! Lol! I feel so old…

I left the office a bit earlier today and until I turned in, I did not see my hsemate. I had thought that we would be planning our outing tomorrow, but I soon started to doubt if she was really sincere in wanting to do it. I was half convinced that she was home and that she’s keeping real quiet to avoid me. She usually works half day on Fridays, so it’s unusual for me not to see her on Fridays. Oh well, I am disappointed but what can I do? Don’t make promises if you don’t intend to keep them. Let’s see what she says if I will bump into her tomorrow. For now, it looks like I am on my own for the weekend. :( 

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Valentine’s Day! - Getting back to routine

In one of the many emails that my sis and I write to each other, her latest said that everyone at home will have to get used to me being back, as everyone has sort of settled into their own rhythm. I told her that it’ll take time but soon, everything will be back as it was.

But this actually got me thinking; and just yesterday as I was talking to Anna, I remember telling her that it will take me some time to get back to routine as I started the year on a different lifestyle compared to my norm. I jumped into a new routine and work habit that I have now gotten used to, and returning back to the old style will probably push a few buttons. But I guess nothing (good) lasts forever. I’ll just have to adapt or change my routine back home, to make it the best of both worlds. Get what I mean?

Anyway, one month into my trip and being at the office here, and I am still confusing people and their names. Someone came looking for Miriam today and I went straight to Miriam and asked her if Miriam was in! Lol! I know almost everyone and their names except Yvonne and Miriam! I keep mixing them up!

My lunch with Robert and Claudia today didn’t’ happen as Carolijn and Aisling decided to take him out for their meeting and one shot have lunch. Hmmm….

It’s also Valentine’s Day! I didn’t receive any roses, chocolates or cards as expected; but I did receive lovely messages on FB from my family. I also did something to make a small difference in the world: Bibiana, Marie, Aisling, Alison and I went to Alexanderplatz and joined the 1Billion Rising Campaign that is happening around the world today. This campaign is about a pledge to end violence against women and girls. There were simultaneous flash mobs around the world. We rushed from the office, got stuck in the metro for about 10 minutes coz it wouldn’t move and then ran to the scene. Thankfully, when we reached the area, they had only just finished the rehearsal and we managed to participate in the event!! Despite watching the video before we left, neither of us could remember the steps but what the heck…it was the atmosphere and the fact that we were there that made all the difference! J I had thought of joining the one back home but then I found out that it’s all happening on the same day! Lol! I even told people here that I was going to compare the two! Haha!

I had dinner with Robert and Clod. It was supposed to be a work meeting but in the end, we decided to just continue working tomorrow. We had a wonderful time talking about culture, marriage, family, travels, experiences; all this while having a scrumptious Turkish dinner. I found out that Robert has a 20-year old daughter and 27-year old son who studied at Oxford (Robert went to Cambridge!). Amidst our talk about marriage and finding partners, Robert told us that he knows of a few girls whom he thinks would suit his son but his son will never listen to him. Lol! And then when I told them about my grandmother and aunts matchmaking me and asking me to find a guy here, Robert told me to play a joke on them: to take a picture with a really big, ugly guy, make him write a sweet note to me behind the picture and then tell them that this is my choice! Lol!!

I also found out that Mattias, Clod’s friend whom I think is cute has broken up with his girlfriend. Poor thing! Haha! Seems she was the one who broke up with him and he’s heartbroken. L Clod said that the girlfriend was not a nice person, always jealous and possessive. Hmmm…

Well….it’s Freitag again tomorrow! That’s almost one week gone of my remaining 4 weeks. Sighs…Just as I am starting to enjoy myself and feel comfortable, time is running out.

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Happy

I woke up today feeling energized and happy! I did everything fast (not intentionally) and was out of the apartment quite early. I took my time to walk to the bakery and then to the bus stop. The bus was not that full today and somehow…everything this morning just went on smoothly. Feels like all the planets were aligned and everything seemed to be going my way. J J

By the way, I forgot to mention that I tried “Kumquat” for the first time yesterday. It’s a small fruit that looks like a hybrid of a lemon and an orange. It’s sour and sweet. The first time I heard the name (back in Penang), I laughed! What a weird name I thought. And then I saw and tasted it for the first time yesterday.

The trainees meeting session with Robert today was very interesting. We learned how to dig up valuable information i.e. secrets of a company from its annual reports and other documents. Very insightful and very helpful. I will now look at these reports with a different eye.

The weekly office cinema was supposed to be at the Berlinale this Saturday night; but Marie only managed to get one ticket despite standing in line for 2 hours and being the 5^th person at the counter!! L Well…it was kind of expected as tickets are sold out in a heartbeat. So I guess I’ll have to look for things to do this weekend. I might decide to go to a mall on Saturday and start buying souvenirs; or ask my hsemate if she wants to spend some time together. After all, I don’t have much time left. Then on Sunday, I’ll probably go to a Flea market with Bibiana. Lol! If now alone I am planning my weekends, I’m going to have a problem back home when I probably will expect to be doing something every weekend!

I was talking to Anna today and when she found out that I have just a little under a month left of my stay, she was shocked! She kept asking me if I am joking and I had to tell her that I wasn’t! And as I was talking to her, a sudden flash of sadness hit me. I realized that I won’t be seeing or talking to these people anymore. Yes…some of us are connected on FB and of course there’ll be promises of emails etc but seriously, how often do people keep such promises? I already know that on my last day here (I’m not sure if I’ll be in the office on the day of my departure), I’ll definitely have tears in my eyes. I feel sad just writing about this. L

On another note, it’s Valentine’s Day tomorrow and contrary to what 90% of the people said about me getting a German guy while on my trip, I am still single! Lol!

By the way, there was snow again today! J

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Restless night…better day

I once again slept early last night; not because I was tired or anything. I was just bored. So I switched on the radio, listened to some music and soon my eyelids were drooping. Despite my early night, I had a restless night. I dreamt of so many things; from my family to work to nonsense. I must have had too much on my mind before I slept (I actually had read a 50-page article before deciding to go to bed).

Therefore, when I got up this morning, I felt as though I had sat in a 10-hour meeting. I felt tired mentally, which is not good as the senior retired lawyer was coming today! Yawn!! I was still bothered about my so-called “what I have learned here” issue. I am pretty sure that the time I have spent here has been useful; but for the life of me, I don’t know why this is bothering me. Perhaps I am afraid that I will not be able to answer questions when I am back home. Or that they will think that it was a waste of time as I “didn’t” learn anything useful.

The bus was slightly late today. And by the time it arrived, there were already so many people in the bus. Thankfully I managed to get in and not get squashed. I understand why people would still want to board the bus despite it being full. I mean, they were probably late for work or an appointment. But just as I got down at my stop and as my bus drove pass me, I saw another bus right behind that was only half full!! Aiyoh!

Not wanting to wait till Thursday for my review, I emailed Claudia asking if we could meet today instead. I had my meeting with her during lunch, and she told me that she totally understands how I feel and where I’m coming from. She said that everything will fall into place at the end of my stay or even 6 months from now. It’s a process that takes time. Right now is the learning/absorbing process and nothing will seem to make sense. She even said that that’s why she’s just letting me absorb everything, whether it’s useful/relevant or not; as the relevancy and usefulness of what I have been exposed to, will only present itself much later. In the end, what I have learned and experienced here will fall into place and I’ll understand or figure out what this trip was all about.

This was exactly the same thing Singapore mum told me. J Claudia also said that she understands that people have expectations of me (and they would probably expect something concrete) and very often, there is no answer to their questions. She also said that it’s good that I voiced my doubts and worries as it’s a learning process for both sides. The end result would be to have both sides saying that this was a very valuable, informative and meaningful stay that was worth it for everyone. On a personal level, I can already say that this trip is worth it! I feel much better after talking to Singapore mum and Claudia. I guess I got worried too fast. There will be no “formal” review this Thursday as what we talked about this afternoon was sufficient; and since we both have nothing extra to add or say, this afternoon’s talk covered my review! Plus, she likes the way I re-worked my work plan to include a comments column where I stated everything that I have done so far. It shows something concrete and that I wasn’t just idle all this while. Her words, not mine. J

Right now, I just plan to learn as much as I can; and enjoy the rest of my stay here. Why plaque myself with unnecessary worry? It just wastes time and makes me miserable. I’m going to forget about all this nonsense and concentrate on enjoying my last few weeks here.

I also joined in Clod’s meeting with Robert and it was an interesting discussion. I asked questions and Robert was actually nice enough to take the time to explain to me and made me feel included. I’ll be joining all the meetings that he has while he is here. I figured, better learn from an expert and even if I can’t contribute, heck, he’s helping ME! J

On another note, my boss here still can’t get over me being here in winter. He told me that during the weekend, when he was in the countryside, sitting by the fire and having a barbeque, he thought of me! Lol! He still finds it amusing that I came from such a hot country into the dead of winter!

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Last 4 weeks

So the last 4 weeks of my stay in Berlin begins. Like a friend said on FB, “So fast.” J

I slept quite early last night. I stayed home the whole day and since there was nothing nice to watch on TV, I decided that an early night would do me good. I woke up this morning feeling fresh and energized. There was no snow or rain but it was cold outside.

I left the apartment quite early as I wanted to get breakfast on the way. I went grocery shopping as I have finished my supply of bread, ham, muesli, coffee etc. I would have gone yesterday but then everything’s closed on Sunday. I still find this weird. Lol!

The sun was up by the time I sat down at my work space and started working. This week will be quite eventful as a retired senior lawyer from the UK is visiting. He’s also going to be the guest at the trainees meeting, conducting a hands-on workshop on investigating companies through their financial accounts. It should be interesting, although right now, the idea of going through a company’s financial accounts sounds quite boring. Nevertheless, let’s see.

During lunch, after we had eaten, a few trainees and I had a ‘team building’ exercise i.e. assembling the new couch. It took us about 45 minutes but the end result was worth it. J I wonder if we’ll ever have one back in the Penang office.

I must also say that I am becoming slightly more adventurous. Now that I sort of know how to read the public service network map, I’ve started to look at how I can go to places that I want to see. I also Google Map the directions just to be sure. That’s how I managed to find my way to Jemimah. I’ll only go exploring on weekends though, so that I can do it when the day is bright, and should I get lost, I’ll still have time to find my way around and be home before it gets dark. :p

Jemimah and her friends were planning to go to a concentration camp yesterday which is about 1 hour away from Berlin, and I was supposed to join them. But plans changed and we didn’t make it. I Googled the place ‘Sachsenhausen Concentration Camp – Oranienburg’ and the place looks really interesting!! I spoke to one of my colleagues about it today and she said that she was planning to go too. So we’re both going to ask the other trainees and plan for a day trip one of these weekends. Yay!

I’m not sure if I have mentioned this in my previous entries, but Berlin seems to have a lack of elevators! My apartment doesn’t have an elevator; my office building has one, however, people tend to use the stairs. This is one reason why once I am in my apartment, I try not to go out as that would mean going down and up 5 floors. Today I counted how many steps there are in my apartment building. The result: 50 steps. No wonder I feel breathless whenever I reach my apartment. 50 steps may not sound like much but to someone like me who never exercises, it’s a lot, especially when I am trying to hurry and get to the warmth of my room! I’m sure that whatever leg muscles that I have gained from all the walking and climbing, will disappear after a few days of being back home as I’ll be driving everywhere then.   

I met Claudia at the bus stop on the way home and she suggested that we have a meeting this Thursday as I am already at my half-way point of the trip. It is to assess how I have been doing so far, and see what else I can do to maximize my remaining time here. And suddenly, I felt scared! I tried to think of what I have learned so far in terms of work and I feel as though I haven’t learned much!! So when I reached home, I immediately scrutinized my work plan and made remarks on what I have done and learned so far. The plan looks full but somehow I feel like I haven’t done much. L Hmmm….maybe it’s just me being insecure and doubting myself. I don’t know. I really hope that when I return to Penang, what I have learned and experienced will justify my time spent here. Sighs…let’s see what happens on Thursday.

Till my next entry…

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Week 5 begins with CNY

As the Chinese around the world usher in the year of the Snake, here I am in Berlin, starting Week 5 of my trip. And once again, like a broken record, I must say how fast time has passed. I have just 4 weekends left.

I Skyped with my sis and mum this morning and got updated on what has happened since we last chatted. Now that I have the soundcard problem fixed, we managed to Skype for nearly 2 hours. J

After the Skype, I had my shower and lunch while I waited for Jemimah to contact me. I waited for her the whole afternoon as I knew that they were touring the Reichstag and museums in the morning. Nevertheless, the afternoon came and went with no news from her. I figured that they were either having a ball or that they got lost in the museums. :p

I didn’t hear from her till 6.20pm, asking if I wanted to meet for dinner. They had gone on a morning walk tour and then did the museums in the afternoon, hence the silence. By then, it was really dark outside; and as I would have had to take the metro to meet them, I asked for a rain check. After all, I am going to see them in London (I think I’m most probably going). I explained that it was really dark and although I have come to terms with the sky turning dark around 5pm, I still don’t feel secured or brave walking around on my own. I’d prefer a group.

I had a home-cooked zucchini-potato-carrot filled tortilla dinner with my hsemate while we had our usual evening chat. We both had had an easy and lazy Sunday. J

And so…as the countdown begins for the last 4 weeks of my trip here, let’s see what other exciting things will crop up for me.

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4 weeks = 28 days = 1 month!

I woke up to a beautiful snowy morning again. I’ve decided not to be negative and to take the falling snow as a blessing from Gaia; that she wants me to enjoy the snow as much as I can before I leave. J

Today marks one month that I am officially in Berlin!! I say one month coz it’s officially day 28, which equates to 4 weeks, which in turns equals one month! That means I have 30 days left of my trip, which I no doubt know will just fly by me. I texted mum to tell her this and her reply was, “You sound like you don’t want to come home.” Lol!

In a way it’s true. I mean, I am enjoying the sort-of-tourist life here. Yes I am working 5-days a week but it’s not really working. Get what I mean? Plus, I’m definitely the outsider here coz I haven’t been here long enough and won’t be here long either. So it’s a different kind of relationship. Not that I am complaining becoz no one is actually treating me like an outsider. I’m just saying.

I know that once I go home, it’ll be back to the old routine, which I hope to change a bit. I’ll probably feel more energized and inspired to work better; and I’m sure I can spruce up my weekends.

Jemimah messaged me about nearly 2pm, after they had settled down and rested. I met her and her friends at the hostel and from there we headed to the Berlin Wall. Sadly, it wasn’t as impressive as I thought it would be. We were all actually quite disappointed. We did see and touch the wall. In fact, we even left our mark there! But it didn’t evoke any deep emotion as I thought it would.

After that we went to have a hot drink as it was freezing, then we went and browsed through some souvenir shops. From there, we decided to go to the Brandenburg Tor. Although I’ve been there, this time it was dark and so the Gate was lighted up. There, we bought some souvenirs. Actually, the “guard” there will stamp your passport with 6 old visa stamps and give you a visa to go into the West; unfortunately, I didn’t bring my passport so I had to settle for the stamps on a postcard. Still, at least it’s something.

We then went for dinner, after which we parted ways, not before planning to meet up again tomorrow. It was so nice to finally mingle with Malaysians again! And I noticed how much “lah” I used while talking! Lol!

Can’t wait to see what’s up for tomorrow. They’ll be going to the museums and I’ll meet up with them afterwards to make plans for my UK trip! J

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Snow covered roof tops again!

Walking back from dinner last night, the ground was wet and the air was cold; I assumed that it had rain while I was having dinner indoors. This morning, when I woke up and did the first thing that I do every morning i.e. look out the window (a habit that I started ever since I came here), I saw that everything was covered with snow! It is back! My heart fell. A couple of sunny days to brighten up my mood, and then as the weekend approaches, the snow comes back. Hmmm…

I thought that the weather was improving and as February moves on, I’ll get to see more sun, there’ll be less rain and the temperature will improve. But as I sat at the table, reading the online newspaper, I noticed that it was snowing quite heavily. I was like…aiyoh!!

About an hour later, as I walked from the bus stop to the office, I realized that the snow actually made every dry tree look pretty. Everything was white and pristine; everything looked so clean! And then I realized that I should enjoy the snow now, as this winter would probably be my first and last winter in a long time. Of course I started using my gloves again. Sighs…

I would love to see and experience the early beginnings of spring (hopefully in early March before I leave); but experiencing snow fall and actually having “smoke” or vapour coming out of my mouth…it’s something to remember for a lifetime! I won’t miss the constant runny nose though.

The office here is getting a couch!! They’re going to assemble it on Monday and it’s for everyone’s use for whatever purpose! Back home, there has been a debate in the office about whether or not to get a couch; well, I think we SHOULD get one! J

Anyway, I chatted with Jemimah today and she’s coming tomorrow! Best thing is…she’s staying at a hostel that is just 7 stops away from the station near me. I know how to get there and I don’t even have to change trains!! Yahoo!!! Now I am excited!

I just can’t believe another weekend is here already. It feels like only yesterday that I said ‘it’s the weekend again’! Tomorrow will mark my 4^th week of being in Berlin i.e. 28 days!

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Increasingly short entries

As the days pass, I find that there’s not much for me to write about. The excitement of being in a new place and visiting all the attractions is slowly starting to decrease. Perhaps when/if I have something to look forward to, then I’ll have more exciting things to write about again.

So the tech guy (Morris/Maurice) came and he said that the sound card is indeed problematic. He can’t change the sound card as it’s in-built in the laptop. So he gave me a special headset that comes with an external sound card instead. The sound from the laptop will now travel through the external sound card and into the headset, so there should be no problem, unless something else in the laptop is faulty. Yay! No cost incurred!

Anna was cleaning her room and she found a sweater that she’s not using and decided to lend it to me. She said she noticed I was wearing one the same colour yday and decided to lend me hers just so that I have a variety of clothes. Lol! Are people starting to notice my same clothes and pitying me already?? Haha! I think they are being sweet. J

I also had my meeting with Claudia today and I asked her what her thoughts are on me so far. After all, it’s nearly a month now that I’ve been here. She said she’s happy with my work and is happy to see me participate in the meetings and all. I’m doing well. Great! I think I am learning a lot and growing as person. I can’t be thankful enough to everyone who pushed, encouraged and supported me on this trip.

So I wore my new boots again today. There is much more feet room so my feet doesn’t feel as though they are suffocating. The pain is still there but not so bad. I took them off at work though, just so my feet could rest. Maybe it was my old pair of boots that caused the pain and discomfort. I knew it would be a problem when I bought it but having gone to soooooo many shops and trying on so many pairs, I settled for the best that I could find then. I also think that the problem is because my feet are not used to being confined in a covered shoe for so long a time. Back home, we take off our shoes when we go to the office and then there’s the option of wearing slippers or sandals. Here, my feet are covered in two pairs of socks and then stuffed into calf-length boots for 9 hours a day and sometimes longer. Hmmm…

When I reached home today, my hsemate immediately came out of her room to greet me. We have not seen each other for 2 days as our timings were just not right. So when she heard the door, she came out of her room just to greet me and tell me that she had cooked some noodles in some tomato sauce for us; but since I had a dinner appointment later on, she told me to eat it the next day. I get the feeling that she has warmed up to me and she’s found that I’m not some annoying Asian who has to depend on her. Lol!

My dad called me today for the first time. He wanted to see how much it would cost him. And then when he found out that I had dinner plans, he asked whether it was with girls or guys!!! Aiyoh!! When I said it was with girls, he then asked me how many of them!! What is with the inquisition? Lol!

I had dinner with Anna and Clod. As Anna coordinates the Women and Human Rights programme and Clod is handling the two workshops, they both wanted to have a brainstorming session with me about mainstreaming gender and also having a session on gender at the workshops.

Tomorrow’s Friday…again! Wow…back in Malaysia, everyone’s getting prepared to celebrate CNY. Here, the Berlin Film Festival just started, should be interesting to go see what happens.

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Weather

Being in a different continent and experiencing a whole new weather system, I can’t help but comment on the weather every day!

Today, as I got ready and even while at work, the sun was up. Everything was bright and cheerful and in a way, it made me feel better. I don’t know why, but the last two days, I’ve felt down. Not sad or depressed, but just down. Could be because my body is tired after the eventful weekend and it is taking time recuperating.

I also have to say that I don’t think I have walked so much in my life!! If I thought that I had walked a lot in Singapore last year, the experience here beats that! Even when we couldn’t find a bus or the metro station on Monday night, Clod wouldn’t even think of taking a taxi. I was more than willing to pay but no! God... the weekend and then Monday, my legs feel as though it went through an exercise regime fit for an Olympic runner!

The side near my big toe on my left foot hurts. I’m not sure if it is because it’s constantly wrapped in socks, my boots are too constricting or it’s the way I walk. Anyhow, I wore my new boots today. It seems heavier than my old one but it could be because the sole is bigger and tougher. Typical winter boots. It’s also more comfortable but I’ll have to wear it for a few days and see if my foot gets better. Else, I’ll have to go see a doctor.

There was a press conference at work today, on “Digital arms trade and corporate responsibility for human rights”. The featured speakers were: Maryam al-Khawaja, co-founder and executive president of the Bahrain Center for Human Rights (Copenhagen) and the daughter of imprisoned since April 2011 in Bahrain human rights activist Abdulhadi Al Khawaja, Wolfgang (the boss), Eric King, research director of Privacy International (London) and Christian Mihr, managing director of Reporters without Borders (Berlin). Impressive people, no? It lasted for about an hour and was mostly in German but I read the announcement and was sort of able to follow as Eric King and Maryam spoke in English.

The trainees meeting was also today and it was a bit confusing as the topic was about ‘cultural imperialism’ which was connected to an interesting article I read about transitional justice. Nevertheless, at the end of it, I think all of us were a bit confused as the topic is so broad and there was no proper end to the discussion. We ran out of time!

I also stayed back to join the cinema night thingy. It was an interesting documentary on abortion; why are illegal abortions more accessible in Poland than legal ones in South Africa? The documentary feature explored and contrasted changes in Poland and South Africa regarding abortion laws and their impact on the lives of women. 

The tech guy is supposed to come tomorrow to check my soundcard and for the first time, I HOPE that the soundcard doesn’t work, so that the problem can be diagnosed.

The weather today was actually VERY nice. Sunny the whole day! But not hot. If only everyday would be like this till I leave. Sighs…

By the way, I forgot to mention that I stopped using my gloves since Saturday. My hands no longer freeze! Which means two things: one, I’m getting used to the weather, and two, the weather is improving! Lol!

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Tired

3 full days of sightseeing and I’m washed out! I mean, all the walking and taking in the info has finally taken its toll on me. Today I could hardly get out of bed. I felt so tired! I think I need to take it easy the rest of the week, else I might fall sick. *touch wood* I need to rest before Jemimah comes!

It was a very quiet day today. I was the first one in my part of the loft as Marie came in about an hour later. But then, she left at lunch time as she was not feeling well. I read up to prepare for tomorrow’s trainees meeting and also replied to some emails.

The weather was crazy: sun, rain, sun, rain. Not that the sun gave out any heat but at least it was brighter and not so gloomy. I decided to take advantage of the absence of the staff here and leave early. Also, I wanted to leave when it wasn’t raining. I came back to the apartment, left my stuff, and then decided to go for a walk. Just to get some fresh air and move around. I also went to get some groceries.

I just relaxed back in the apartment, not really doing anything. I listened to music (soundcard ok!!), browsed the net, chatted with a friend and read the news.

Tomorrow is going to be a full day, as everyone will be back at the office and it’s also the screening of a documentary with the presence of the director. Plus, there’s a press conference in the morning followed by the trainees meeting. I guess I made the right decision to take it easy today.

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This is the shortest entry since I arrived here.

And yet another week begins

It’s the start of another week. It’s now week 4 for me here in Berlin.

I had a wonderful, wonderful weekend, so much so that my body was aching when I woke up this morning. My arms and legs felt as though I had run 4 marathons. All the walking, climbing of stairs and taking pictures finally took their toll! Lol! But it was worth it.

The staff at the office are at their staff planning meeting for the next two days, so it’s only the legal trainees who are here. Doesn’t feel like there’s much difference coz it’s always quiet anyway. I spent the whole day going through a case. It was only 12 pages and yet…!

The sky looked cloudy when I was at the bus stop this morning but I saw the sun peeking through the clouds. However, as soon as I reached the office and got settled, it started raining! Sighs…it was raining all morning and even through lunch.

I managed to chat with my family during lunch today. J But of course this time, the soundcard wasn’t working properly and both sides sounded like aliens. Lol! Still…it was nice to be able to chat even if it was for a few minutes.

Also, I have learnt 50 German words so far! Not bad I should say, even if 17 of those words come from the days of the week and the numbers 1 – 10. :p Still trying to string my first sentence but I don’t know anything about the rules of grammar in German. Hmmm…

I left the office early today. I only found out as I was leaving that there were only 3 of us in the office as some trainees decided to work from home; while others came and left early. Maybe I should do that tomorrow; after all, there is this cinema thing on Wednesday that only starts at 7pm and God knows what time that will end, as the director of the movie (Abortion Democracy) will be there as well.

Anyway, I went to the second hand bookshop and browsed around. Unfortunately, they didn’t have the book I was looking for; neither did they have any interesting books. I’ll have to go to the other one on the other street.

Today I visited yet another museum: the Jewish Museum. The outside of the building was impressive. But honestly, besides the part of the museum that showcased the Holocaust period, I personally found it quite boring as it gave such a detailed account of the Jewish history. One room that I found really impressive was actually an empty room, with no heating or light. You entered the room and closed the door and let your imagination go wild. It was designed by the artist for a free interpretation of the room, to let you experience (or not) how the Jewish people felt while in concentration camps. That room evoked all negative feelings; fear, despair, anguish, loss, for me at least.

One funny thing that happened: a worker in the museum asked if I could speak French or English. Then he asked me what country I was from coz he couldn’t decide between Malaysia and Indonesia. When I said Malaysia, he was still skeptical coz he said I have the Indian look and asked if I could speak Hindi or Gujerati. Lol! And apparently…I have an accent when I speak English. I also minted my own coin and found out my name in Hebrew!!

We headed home after the museum as it was already late and we had yet to eat dinner. I had my first doner kebab today!

The only thing left that I REALLY want to see is the Berlin Wall. That is something that MUST be done before I leave, else I would not have ended my trip properly.

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2 museums in a day

As I start Week 4 here, I woke up and immediately updated my blog and posted all the pictures that I took yesterday. It was a lazy first half of the day, as I lazed around in my pajamas, chatted with my sis and Aunty Lita and did laundry.

I met up with Clod at 3pm and then we headed to the Isle of Museums once again. Today’s target was the Pergamon Museum and OMG…it was fantastic. Breathtaking! It cannot be compared to the Neues Museum because it evoked such different emotions. I was literally in Ancient Greece, Rome and Babylonia. The spectacular architecture was just amazing. I find it sooooo hard to believe that these were REAL structures; so majestic and grand! We took our time scouring the museum and yet when we came out, we found that we still had time to visit another museum!!

So we went to the Altes Museum (Old Museum) where statues from Ancient Greece and Rome were on display. Another fantastic place! J We also tried to go to the Berliner Dom but our 3-day pass did not cover that place so we just took pictures from the outside.

So if I was transported back to Egypt yesterday, today I went back to Greece, Rome and Babylonia! Wow! It’s no wonder that Clod has been to the Pergamon Museum 5 times before this and still yearns to go back!!

I also called dad, as with the time difference, he would be ushering in his birthday at 5pm my time. He was surprised to receive a call from me that he actually asked who was on the line. Lol!

After the two museums, Clod and I headed back home to rest. We met up for dinner and then decided that we would make plans tomorrow; either go to the Jewish Museum or the Berlin Memorial Museum.

And so another week has passed. As I begin to settle and feel comfortable with my situation here, I find that time is now against me. Ironic isn’t it, when 3 weeks ago I was thinking of going home…

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Saturday - Nefertiti and more

This entry is one day late.

Today marks 3 weeks since I have been here! How time flies indeed! The days and weeks seem to go by in a flash; and I think it’s because I have something to do almost every weekend and I don’t have the time to just mope around. I am actually wondering whether I will go back to my usual routine when I’m home, or change how I spend my free time at home.

I was texting with mum last night and she told me that I will miss Berlin. And you know what…I will indeed miss Berlin. I know it! The people that I have come to know, the familiar places around my area where I live, the easy-going lifestyle and the fact that I actually lived in another country, another continent, in a different climate, all by myself! If that alone is not a wonderful, wonderful memory, then I don’t know what planet I am living on.

I will admit that when this exchange idea came up and I was set to go, I had a lot of doubts, fears, insecurities etc. But I must say, all the sacrifices have paid off and I do feel as though I have grown. J These last two paragraphs sound like the entry for AFTER my trip but I feel oblige to state it even now coz I know this is one hell of an adventure and experience that will forever be etched in my mind. Only God knows WHEN I’ll return here, possibly with my family.

So the first thing I did when I got up this morning was look out the window. And there was no sun. L I was hoping for the sun so that it will be a wonderful day to be outside, sightseeing. Plus…it was drizzling.

After changing and eating a breakfast that I hoped would last me till mid-afternoon, I then left the apartment to start my day. I took the U-Bahn by myself to Alexanderplatz and I felt victorious thereafter, when I managed to meet Marie at our appointed meeting place. And I was right on time! We then took the S-Bahn to Hackesher Mrkt and from there we walked to the Isle of Museums.

We headed straight for the Neues Museum where Nefertiti is, and stood in line to get our tickets. The line was quite long but it was moving fast so the wait wasn’t too long. We decided to get the 3-day pass as it was cheaper and so that Clod and I could visit other museums in the next two days as well.

With the tickets and guide book in our hands, off we were to start our tour back in time to Egypt, Rome and Greece! We spent nearly 3 hours in the museum and we didn’t even feel the time pass. In fact, we were supposed to meet Bibiana and Linda ay 3pm but we only met them at 5pm!

The exhibition was fantastic! I just couldn’t get enough of it and the fact that I could take pictures…wow! I mean, I was seeing ancient artifacts, real tombstones, sarcophaguses, and of course…Nefertiti!! She was placed in one room, all by herself, right in the middle. The moment I entered the room that was next to hers and I spotted her, I couldn’t concentrate on the rest of the exhibition! But I forced myself to be patient, before Marie and I spent about 20 minutes just staring at her. She was perfection! If she was a real person, I can imagine that she would be really beautiful. At the same time, I couldn’t help but wonder whether the artist who did the bust had exaggerated in detailing her beauty; After all, she was a queen who was revered. Nevertheless, Nefertiti was a sight to behold!

Marie and I couldn’t believe and accept the fact that we were seeing all these things from millions of years ago. And the funny thing is, we’re seeing it in Berlin, not Egypt! Lol! Now I can’t wait to see the Pergamon Museum.

After touring the whole museum, we decided to go have coffee and cake before starting our shopping. We didn’t spend too much time shopping as we had dinner to attend and we were already running behind schedule. I managed to fine a pair of real winter boots and it was cheap for European standard. I actually like another pair but it wasn’t suitable for the weather, so there was no point getting it; plus, I would not be wearing it back home!

So Bibiana, Linda, Marie and I headed to Analene’s house after our shopping, and there we helped prepare dinner. It was to be a cheese fondue dinner, so everything had to be bite-size. Of course there was wine; every dinner seems to have at least 2 bottles of wine. J

The dinner was great! The food was good, the drinks were good (there was wine and schnaps), and the company was good. I had a really good time; considering these are my colleagues! We didn’t talk about work at all! We should have such gatherings back home! But the difference is, most of the people here are single.

Also found out that Claudia is gay; though I had suspected. Lol!

We finally left Analene’s house at 2am. Bibiana and I walked back home. Clod and I made plans for tomorrow and possibly Monday. J

I suddenly feel as though my time here now is running with the speed of light! And to think that I was counting down the days to go home! Now I am counting down how many days I have left here!! Everyone is telling me to come back for summer and that’s going to be my next motivation – to save money and return during summer!

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