Concentration Camp

I was so hoping for good weather today as we were going to visit a concentration camp. When I woke up…it was snowing and the temperature was -4C!! My first thought was “Oh no! Is anyone going to come? And is it possible to walk the grounds in this weather?”! But by the time I changed and had my breakfast, it had stopped snowing and I started to feel positive. I also wondered whether it was the Universe’s way of telling me that since I am visiting the camp, I should experience it, almost as how the prisoners there lived. Almost. 

It was snowing slightly when I left the apartment, and it was cold. I took the metro by myself, changed stations and trains and managed to find our meeting point. J In the end, only four of us met up: Marie, Carolijn, Claudia and me. The others pulled out at the last minute coz one was sick and another had a really late night.

The train ride to Birkenwerder took about 30-40 minutes and we spent the whole time talking about everything under the sun. And then, it was another 20 minutes bus ride to another stop; and then….it was another 2kms to the Sachsenhausen Camp. Believe it or not, we WALKED that 2kms but it was not that cold and as we were all excited, I guess adrenalin took over.

When we reached the camp area, we headed to the information center to get the audio guides and maps. Then it was a walk down Camp Street, where the prisoners had to walk through before reaching the actual camp ground. Back then, there were no walls and so the public could actually see them walking. Women and children threw stones and shouted profanity at them. I can only imagine how the prisoners felt!

There was also a museum for the Oranienburg Concentration Camp there (this camp is often confused with the Sachsenhausen camp); but it was on a much smaller scale with no actual buildings or structures. It was just a normal museum. But small and normal, we actually spent an hour in there!

After that…it was time to enter the gates to hell! Of course, just at the entrance gate, there are the famous words of the camp, “Arbeit Macht Frei” which means, "labour makes (you) free". Sickening right? I mean, it’s a concentration camp where people hardly survived, the workload being one of the reasons for the deaths!! Marie told me that in some other camps, there are phrases such as “because you deserve this” on the gates!! Sickening!!

The first thing that hit me when I entered the gates was how big the area was. Granted, there are not many structures left and so the grounds were bare. Nevertheless, that sight actually made me flinch. Walking the grounds from one area to another, in the freezing weather (somehow, with the lack of buildings around, the wind, snow and cold seemed worse), with my hands frozen to the point that I could not feel them, and with the wind just threatening to blow me off my feet, I had only one thought running through my mind: “How did they live? Especially without proper clothing, food, shoes etc.” This thought kept running in my head that I really couldn't think of anything else.

There was not much of an opportunity to take pictures because there was nothing much to capture. The important stuff is in a building where no cameras are allowed. When Claudia asked if I wanted a picture of me in the area, I said no. It didn't feel right doing such a thing: smiling and posing in an area where so much horror happened. People might say that I’m stupid for not taking a picture of myself in the area; but to me, having been IN the area and seeing and sort of experiencing (read: the cold) what the prisoners went through, that’s a "picture" worth more than one in a camera.

As we were walking towards the exit of the camp, I saw a sign that said “Neutral Zone”; and I wondered “what the hell was it doing here?!” I mean, seriously??? I just had to take a picture of that!! Just before I passed through the gates, “escaping” or rather leaving behind the camp area, I took one last look and tried to imagine the place as it was back then: with buildings and vehicles, the smells and sounds, and of course, the people, both dead and alive. Sighs…this was not Auswitch and yet…sighs. And I just learned that there were actually 3 Auzwitch camps, not one as I thought!!

We spent nearly 3 hours there and yet, we did not see everything! It was just TOO cold. It’s a pity that we didn't get to see everything but I am happy that I visited the camp no matter how little time we spent there. I guess it’ll take more than one trip to fully internalize what happened all those years back; but then again, I don’t think it’s possible to understand and accept that such atrocities were done to human, by humans. I don’t think I will ever really understand how such a thing could have happened.

This visit evoked more emotion in me than when I visited the Wall. I tried hard to imagine living in a city that was divided; yet somehow, I just couldn't grasp the emotion needed to understand how it felt to be living in one state governed by two totally different systems. Sighs…

As we were heading back towards Berlin, I mentioned to Claudia that I was wondering how the people in that town feels about living in a place so near the camp area. And she told me that, people tend to ignore or be in denial that such things ever happened. In fact, back then, even though people knew what was happening in that camp, people just kept quiet and kept to themselves. She said it would be interesting to interview someone from that period and listen to their thoughts. Hmmm…

In order to get over the unforgettable emotions, I went souvenir shopping after the four of us said goodbye. I got a few things for my family but I still feel like I need to buy more! Lol! Next weekend would be my last time to shop coz the weekend after that will be spent packing!

Wow….16 days left! I’m hoping to go to a flea market tomorrow. That is if I am not lazy and if it’s not snowing! J Otherwise, I’ll just stay in bed!

What a day it was! 

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