Relaxed Sunday

After a wonderful Saturday filled with laughter, long walks in the cold cold weather and visits to interesting places, I spent today relaxing.

I slept at nearly midnight yesterday as I wanted to upload whatever pictures I had taken and also update my blog. I got up at around 9am today when I received a Thaipusam text message. Sis had sent a text earlier but I didn’t hear it.

I went online and managed to Skype with my family for nearly 1.5hours! I figured that I should let the soundcard rest for a week each time; and then it’ll probably pity me and start working properly. I got updated about the Thaipusam events that happened today. Sis and mum did not make it up the 513 steps but sis is hopeful that she’ll do it tonight. I’ll only know tomorrow if she succeeded doing it.

I met Clod for lunch. We decided to go to a park (Hasenheide Park) and just walk around and get some fresh air. Yes…despite it snowing quite heavily! On the way to the park, we met up with Mattias J and the three of us walked to the park. Surprisingly, the park was quite crowded, with children sliding down the small snow hills or playing with the snow. We were there for only a short while as they both had to catch the bus to get to the main station.  

Week 2 is over! It feels surreal that I only arrived here last week! I’m not sure if time is indeed passing fast but it’s already the last few days of January and then comes February. Mum says that February will pass fast as there’s only 28 days! Lol!

I went to a few souvenirs shops yesterday and I got a rough idea of what I want to buy. But I’ll have to see if there is enough space in my baggage and also the weight. When I left Penang, my bag was around 18kg, so I basically have about 2-3 kg more that I can add. KLM allows up to 23kg so…But then, if I do have to pay excess baggage, what the hell!! I probably will have the money and also it’s once in a lifetime!

Having so much free time today got me thinking. I don’t know why but I ALWAYS have this feeling that I don’t know much about my work. I have been in my organization for 5 years (this November will be 6) and yet somehow, I always feel inadequate about my knowledge at work. I feel that people always seem to know more; they understand things faster; or they just seem smarter. I really don’t know if it’s an inferior problem of my own or that I am just making all this up.

I mean, I don’t think I would have stayed at the organization this long if I didn’t know anything. I wouldn’t have been put on the PPT team or even be sent on this exchange programme. The people here who have read my CV were impressed, so I must have done and be doing something right. I have this niggling feeling that when I return home to Penang, I won’t have much to tell my boss or organization what I did here; crazy thoughts that have been quashed by Claudia and even Wolfgang. They've told me not to stress out, that it’s a learning process and that I’ll do fine.

Nevertheless, I’m not exactly sure how, but I MUST get this negative feeling out of my head; this lack of self-confidence. It’s not healthy I know! Sighs…I must really have too much free time to be having these thoughts! Get a grip Shakun!! Lol!!

Another week has passed, and so begins another in a few hours. It’s only 6.15 here but I think I’ll call it a day for my online activities.

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