So I went to the Doc this morning, to check out my bump and also subdue my paranoia. The first thing the Doc said to me was, "It's not cancer". Lol! Ok...so I sort of knew that. I had been thinking more along the lines of swollen lymph node or blood vessels.
So he checked my pressure, felt my bump (which at first, he said it wasn't a bump) then proceeded to tell me that the whole area was swollen. It felt like a protruding bone. He said it could be an injury but I have not fallen or hit my head in recent times.
He couldn't help me much, saying that for things like this, I would need to go to the hospital to get a CAT scan or MRI. But he's pretty sure it's nothing serious and that the headaches are caused by my fiddling and pressing the bump.
He prescribed some painkillers and anti-swelling meds and told me not to worry.
Well...for now...I'll gladly listen to him. I think it's a mind over matter thing. If I can just ignore the bump and not dwell on it every minute of the day, I'm sure I'll be fine.
September 30, 2011
September 28, 2011
Me the hypochondriac
I have a grand-aunt who's a hypochondriac. She reads magazines, books, articles and has, somehow or rather, almost all the ailments that she reads about. From having agoraphobia to having heart palpitations. Sometimes it's just tiring listening to her complain or moan about her "ailments".
But then.....recently...and I stress...VERY recently...I feel like I'm turning into a hypochondriac. Last week, I found a bump on the right backside of my head. I panicked although it was not painful. I asked my mum and sis to feel the bump and they both said they could feel it. They said it was nothing and that it'll go away. But that didn't subdue me. I continued worrying coz I was also getting occasional bashes of short, sharp, throbbing pain on one side.
A week later and the bump has reduced in size but I continued worrying. The bashes of pain comes and go and the bump, although small , is still there! And it's nagging me!
Vay is close to smacking me as I'm constantly asking her to feel my head. My colleague and Trish told me it's nothing to worry about and it's probably an inflammation. But worry-wart me turned to Google; and of course, that's never a good idea. Results varying from brain cancer to migraine to tension headaches popped up, confusing me even further. Stress could be one contributing factor especially since I'm not the type to vent. Hmmm....
I'm pretty sure the pain is migraine, no thanks to PMS. But I can't neglect the bump! And....being the psycho that I am, every time I touch the bump, I feel nauseous. Geez!! So I've decided to see the Doc this Friday to check it out. I hope I don't have to have a CAT scan or MRI. There I go again!! He most probably will just tell me I'm insane.
But until I get it checked out, I know I won't rest well. And I'll most probably get beaten up by Vay.
But then.....recently...and I stress...VERY recently...I feel like I'm turning into a hypochondriac. Last week, I found a bump on the right backside of my head. I panicked although it was not painful. I asked my mum and sis to feel the bump and they both said they could feel it. They said it was nothing and that it'll go away. But that didn't subdue me. I continued worrying coz I was also getting occasional bashes of short, sharp, throbbing pain on one side.
A week later and the bump has reduced in size but I continued worrying. The bashes of pain comes and go and the bump, although small , is still there! And it's nagging me!
Vay is close to smacking me as I'm constantly asking her to feel my head. My colleague and Trish told me it's nothing to worry about and it's probably an inflammation. But worry-wart me turned to Google; and of course, that's never a good idea. Results varying from brain cancer to migraine to tension headaches popped up, confusing me even further. Stress could be one contributing factor especially since I'm not the type to vent. Hmmm....
I'm pretty sure the pain is migraine, no thanks to PMS. But I can't neglect the bump! And....being the psycho that I am, every time I touch the bump, I feel nauseous. Geez!! So I've decided to see the Doc this Friday to check it out. I hope I don't have to have a CAT scan or MRI. There I go again!! He most probably will just tell me I'm insane.
But until I get it checked out, I know I won't rest well. And I'll most probably get beaten up by Vay.
September 24, 2011
WTH!
And I thought it was off my back. But noooo...........!!! What's with all the matchmaking??? Geez!!
There I was, sitting in a meeting that was supposed to last only 3 hours but was already way past the 3 hour benchmark and I get a call on my HP. It's from one of my aunts. I ignore the call. 10 seconds later, my HP vibrates again. It's one of my aunts again. I answer the call, thinking it must be something important.
Me: Hello
Aunt: Shakun, aunt so-and-so here. Are you busy?
Me: Yes I am. I am in a meeting. Anything?
Aunt: Oh...nvm. Call me back after your meeting.
Me: Ok.
So it's nothing really important. Or so I thought. Then...I get an SMS from my mum. Apparently, my aunt has found a groom for me. She called my parents to have a SERIOUS talk. The guy is apparently tall, fair, good-looking and is a cop who's about to be promoted. Uh-huh....I know my aunt's taste and I can just imagine how the guy looks. Just think, when I told her last time that I prefer guys with no moustache, she told me that guys with no moustache look like monkeys!! :s
Knowing how I feel and what I think about arranged marriages, my mum and dad called my aunt and said no. My dad told them that I'm not ready, now's not the time etc. My aunt had the audacity to tell my father that "there won't be another chance next time."
WTH???!! First of all, who cares if there's no "next time"? How/why is it their problem? My dad said that they're just being nice and CONCERN about me. PLEEAAASEEE-lah! I know them. When it comes to things like this, it's all about competition between the cousins and aunts. Oh...this cousin is married, this cousin is getting married next year, now it's your turn etc.
Seriously-lah, don't they have other more important things to do than meddle in my life? What is it about me wanting to be single that they don't understand? When they asked me during Raya when I intended to settle down, I told them point blank that I am not interested. Big mistake! I got a lecture on how/why I should have a life partner to take care of me; how I am at the "right" age and that I shouldn't wait too long etc. Geez!!!
I'm a very patient person and there are people who can attest to that. But I know that the one thing that will push me to my breaking point is all this matchmaking business. I told my father yesterday that if I hear one more time this issue of marriage and matchmaking, I'm going to tell them off. Dad told me not to upset THEM!! All this while, my sis and I have been the goody-two shoes; the polite ones. Wait till they see me angry. Their whole perspective and impression of me will change. And honestly, I don't care what they think of me after that. There's only so much dabbling and harassing I can take and sooner or later, I'm going to have to tell them to shut up! In addition to this, I'm also being harassed about being able to cook so that I can please my future husband and family. OMG!!!
Trish is so excited about this however. She wants to see the guy's picture; know who he is etc. Baliw!! You're welcome to him Trish but just don't get me involved!!
GEEZ!!! Leave me alone already!
There I was, sitting in a meeting that was supposed to last only 3 hours but was already way past the 3 hour benchmark and I get a call on my HP. It's from one of my aunts. I ignore the call. 10 seconds later, my HP vibrates again. It's one of my aunts again. I answer the call, thinking it must be something important.
Me: Hello
Aunt: Shakun, aunt so-and-so here. Are you busy?
Me: Yes I am. I am in a meeting. Anything?
Aunt: Oh...nvm. Call me back after your meeting.
Me: Ok.
So it's nothing really important. Or so I thought. Then...I get an SMS from my mum. Apparently, my aunt has found a groom for me. She called my parents to have a SERIOUS talk. The guy is apparently tall, fair, good-looking and is a cop who's about to be promoted. Uh-huh....I know my aunt's taste and I can just imagine how the guy looks. Just think, when I told her last time that I prefer guys with no moustache, she told me that guys with no moustache look like monkeys!! :s
Knowing how I feel and what I think about arranged marriages, my mum and dad called my aunt and said no. My dad told them that I'm not ready, now's not the time etc. My aunt had the audacity to tell my father that "there won't be another chance next time."
WTH???!! First of all, who cares if there's no "next time"? How/why is it their problem? My dad said that they're just being nice and CONCERN about me. PLEEAAASEEE-lah! I know them. When it comes to things like this, it's all about competition between the cousins and aunts. Oh...this cousin is married, this cousin is getting married next year, now it's your turn etc.
Seriously-lah, don't they have other more important things to do than meddle in my life? What is it about me wanting to be single that they don't understand? When they asked me during Raya when I intended to settle down, I told them point blank that I am not interested. Big mistake! I got a lecture on how/why I should have a life partner to take care of me; how I am at the "right" age and that I shouldn't wait too long etc. Geez!!!
I'm a very patient person and there are people who can attest to that. But I know that the one thing that will push me to my breaking point is all this matchmaking business. I told my father yesterday that if I hear one more time this issue of marriage and matchmaking, I'm going to tell them off. Dad told me not to upset THEM!! All this while, my sis and I have been the goody-two shoes; the polite ones. Wait till they see me angry. Their whole perspective and impression of me will change. And honestly, I don't care what they think of me after that. There's only so much dabbling and harassing I can take and sooner or later, I'm going to have to tell them to shut up! In addition to this, I'm also being harassed about being able to cook so that I can please my future husband and family. OMG!!!
Trish is so excited about this however. She wants to see the guy's picture; know who he is etc. Baliw!! You're welcome to him Trish but just don't get me involved!!
GEEZ!!! Leave me alone already!
September 4, 2011
Geezz
God! I can't believe how lazy I am to update my blog! Not that I have much to update anyway, but still.........
So the other day, last Wednesday to be exact, mum, sis, Trish, Sumayah (cousin) and I went for ladies night at SS (Slippery Senorita). As it turned out, since it was Merdeka night, there was NO ladies night but we still got in free. Of course....being the earliest there, we had the whole club to ourselves for about a half hour before the crowd started trickling in. As Prem was working that night, we of course had great service. Plus....dad's friends are the managers, bouncers, waiters etc, so we were constantly taken care of!
The Filipino band was horrible sadly but since I had good company and with non-stop alcohol, I had a great time. Believe it or not, it was my first time clubbing!! And that too with my mum present (and later on, my dad!!!). Being at the ripe "old" age of 27, and that was my first time clubbing! How ULU!! And....with parents around....who will approach us??!
Well....I guess it's because I've grown up around the club scene when dad was with the band. Plus, having parents that are so liberal, who'll allow me to drink and go out without questioning, I guess that's why I've never had the urge to go clubbing. I remember back in college, when my friends used to go out every night and I wondered what the great pull was?
In fact, that one night in SS was proof that I have not lost out on anything by not clubbing. I certainly don't mind losing out on being in a room filled with smoke; and then coming out of a club after that, all reeking of alcohol and cigarette smoke!! Ewww........my hair still had the smoke smell the next day even AFTER I had washed my hair!!
I don't think I'll make this clubbing thing a regular affair but I certainly wouldn't object to a once in a while clubbing. The next round is probably during Deepavali; plans are being made, but that's all just talk for now.
Sighs...I'm so not looking forward to waking up early tomorrow for work. My boss is not here, so that's a plus point but still....
So the other day, last Wednesday to be exact, mum, sis, Trish, Sumayah (cousin) and I went for ladies night at SS (Slippery Senorita). As it turned out, since it was Merdeka night, there was NO ladies night but we still got in free. Of course....being the earliest there, we had the whole club to ourselves for about a half hour before the crowd started trickling in. As Prem was working that night, we of course had great service. Plus....dad's friends are the managers, bouncers, waiters etc, so we were constantly taken care of!
The Filipino band was horrible sadly but since I had good company and with non-stop alcohol, I had a great time. Believe it or not, it was my first time clubbing!! And that too with my mum present (and later on, my dad!!!). Being at the ripe "old" age of 27, and that was my first time clubbing! How ULU!! And....with parents around....who will approach us??!
Well....I guess it's because I've grown up around the club scene when dad was with the band. Plus, having parents that are so liberal, who'll allow me to drink and go out without questioning, I guess that's why I've never had the urge to go clubbing. I remember back in college, when my friends used to go out every night and I wondered what the great pull was?
In fact, that one night in SS was proof that I have not lost out on anything by not clubbing. I certainly don't mind losing out on being in a room filled with smoke; and then coming out of a club after that, all reeking of alcohol and cigarette smoke!! Ewww........my hair still had the smoke smell the next day even AFTER I had washed my hair!!
I don't think I'll make this clubbing thing a regular affair but I certainly wouldn't object to a once in a while clubbing. The next round is probably during Deepavali; plans are being made, but that's all just talk for now.
Sighs...I'm so not looking forward to waking up early tomorrow for work. My boss is not here, so that's a plus point but still....
August 28, 2011
Of piercings and tattoos
It's been almost a month since I last updated my blog and that too was to say that I have been so busy.
In truth, I am sometimes just plain lazy to think and come up with an entry. I don't lead a very exciting life, so talking about my everyday life is just so boring!
Over the past few weeks, I've celebrated my sister's 21st birthday (it's all on her blog), have been busy with meetings, workshops and trainings at work, and ... hmm...I can't really remember what else.
So I went out with Trish and my sis yesterday, and after much nagging and persuasion, I managed to get my sis to pierce her second ear hole. I got my second ear hole right after Form 5 and that's been like 9 years!! My sis has left school for 4 years and only NOW she's getting one. Lol! She says she feels like a rebel having two earrings on one ear! *roll eyes*
I wanted to get a 3rd one yday but the MILD OCD in me is giving me doubts. For those who know me, I must have everything in even numbers, else I'd feel weird. So having 3 earholes on my ear is making me think twice. But then again, if I get a 3rd piercing, I'd have SIX holes, and that's even! Gosh.....I sound mad! As of now...I'm still debating on whether I should get another piercing or not.
On another hand, I feel like getting a tattoo. Mum has no objections provided I tattoo HER name! Though I think she's just joking. However, getting a tattoo is serious business. One, there's the risk of getting HIV. Two, it cannot be removed (which I'm not worried about). Three, there's the cost; getting a tattoo is not cheap! So for now....I might just have to settle with permanent marker ink on my skin (and the risk of skin cancer) or the traditional henna. Hmmm...
I'd better stop here before I start rambling on and on and on....
In case I don't have another entry for the next one month...here's wishing everyone out there,
In truth, I am sometimes just plain lazy to think and come up with an entry. I don't lead a very exciting life, so talking about my everyday life is just so boring!
Over the past few weeks, I've celebrated my sister's 21st birthday (it's all on her blog), have been busy with meetings, workshops and trainings at work, and ... hmm...I can't really remember what else.
So I went out with Trish and my sis yesterday, and after much nagging and persuasion, I managed to get my sis to pierce her second ear hole. I got my second ear hole right after Form 5 and that's been like 9 years!! My sis has left school for 4 years and only NOW she's getting one. Lol! She says she feels like a rebel having two earrings on one ear! *roll eyes*
I wanted to get a 3rd one yday but the MILD OCD in me is giving me doubts. For those who know me, I must have everything in even numbers, else I'd feel weird. So having 3 earholes on my ear is making me think twice. But then again, if I get a 3rd piercing, I'd have SIX holes, and that's even! Gosh.....I sound mad! As of now...I'm still debating on whether I should get another piercing or not.
On another hand, I feel like getting a tattoo. Mum has no objections provided I tattoo HER name! Though I think she's just joking. However, getting a tattoo is serious business. One, there's the risk of getting HIV. Two, it cannot be removed (which I'm not worried about). Three, there's the cost; getting a tattoo is not cheap! So for now....I might just have to settle with permanent marker ink on my skin (and the risk of skin cancer) or the traditional henna. Hmmm...
I'd better stop here before I start rambling on and on and on....
In case I don't have another entry for the next one month...here's wishing everyone out there,
A HAPPY MERDEKA AND EID MUBARAK!!!
August 2, 2011
August
It's already August!! Puasa has started. My sis's 21st birthday is in two weeks; then it'll be Raya, then Merdeka. Before I know it, it'll be Deepavali and then Xmas!! Whoa.......time is indeed just zooming.......!!!!
Been busy at work. Rushing this and that. Plus there's this big Tribunal thing that is happening in India in December, so we're all gearing up for it. I've said that I don't want to have any work stuff here in my blog, but I can't seem to help it as work takes up half my time. Just the other day, my colleagues and I were rushing to finish a proposal. The call for the proposal came out about 2 1/2 months ago but due to delays and procrastination by a certain someone....we are had to bear the brunt of her actions!! We managed to submit the proposal on time so we can only hope that we get the funding.
On another note...my grandparents and aunt and uncle came for a visit!! It's been years since we all last saw each other, so it was great fun meeting up!!
Am at work now...curi-curi writing this...hehe....
Been busy at work. Rushing this and that. Plus there's this big Tribunal thing that is happening in India in December, so we're all gearing up for it. I've said that I don't want to have any work stuff here in my blog, but I can't seem to help it as work takes up half my time. Just the other day, my colleagues and I were rushing to finish a proposal. The call for the proposal came out about 2 1/2 months ago but due to delays and procrastination by a certain someone....we are had to bear the brunt of her actions!! We managed to submit the proposal on time so we can only hope that we get the funding.
On another note...my grandparents and aunt and uncle came for a visit!! It's been years since we all last saw each other, so it was great fun meeting up!!
Am at work now...curi-curi writing this...hehe....
July 5, 2011
Sighs....
I’m writing about this because I feel that I’ve endured it for far too long and no matter how many times I tell myself that I should not let it bother me, I always get affected anyway. I get irritated; I get annoyed; I become bitter. And I hate it when that happens.
--
I’m the type of person who likes to stay home. I read, watch TV, listen to music or sleep. I go out occasionally, when I feel like it and when the time is right. I like having a routine. I don’t have that incessant need or feeling of always wanting or having to go out. I’m not a social bee or butterfly or whatever. Being a homebody doesn’t bother me. I’m comfortable staying at home and having what some people would call, “a boring” life. Yes…there are times when I myself feel that my life is mundane and that everyone around me has a much more fun life, especially since I’m still young. But that feeling comes and then subsides like the waves in the ocean. If I want a change, then it’s up to me to do something about it.This ‘complain’ entry has been long coming. I’m not sure if I have a similar entry written years ago coz I can’t remember (though I won’t be surprised if there is one). So…like I said above, I’m the kind of person who likes to stay home; and anyone who knows me, knows that. And because of this, I’ve gotten so much of crap comments about me being old, not fun, uncool etc. Some even say that I won’t meet anyone i.e. bf, husband etc if I continue this way.
I don’t know if it is insecurity or jealousy or that I just have a warped mind, but there are times when I actually think twice about introducing my friends (the few of them that I have) to my parents. I know…sounds sick right? While I love the fact that my parents are so accepting and accommodating, and that my friends click with them so well, I tend to feel that after awhile, my friends tend to prefer my parents. After all, I’m the “old” one, no? The one who always says no and is as controlling and uncool as an 80-year old spinster. Even my own mum says I'm old and boring and have no life. Sighs. I’m always told that my parents are cool and that people are jealous coz I’m so lucky my parents are not like parents. Yes…my parents are great. Thank God!
What I don’t understand, is why people just can’t seem to understand and/or accept that I (and my sis to an extent) am a homebody. We are different from our parents. Just because they made us, doesn’t mean we are their clones. So I don’t go out so often. So what if (back in high school), the few times that I actually went out with my friends, we went to the State museum? It’s not coz we’re boring or nerds, but one friend in the group had not been to the museum and had wanted to go. I didn’t know we had to go clubbing or do the “normal-typical” stuff that teens do.
I know I turn down many invitations to go out and that me accepting one is rare. I don’t mind the many invitations (at least I know I am remembered and that people actually want me around) but what I really hate are the remarks. My parents always encourage me to go out; in fact, I don’t think they’ve ever said no to me whenever I wanted to go out. So, permission is definitely not a problem. Finance is an issue coz how can you go out and NOT spend? Yes…I admit that I rarely go out as I prefer to save whatever little $$ that I can. After all, emergencies have cropped up and these little savings are the saviours. And...I'm not complaining about this mind you.
All I am saying, or at least trying to say is this: do not compare me to my parents. They are from a whole different generation. Yes…they are the more fun, upbeat, cool type. I am not. We don't even have that much in common when it comes to having fun. Maybe that's why my friends like them more. Hmm...I sometimes wish that I was (and try to be) like them. Easy to talk to, friendly, approachable. But alas, I have my own personality.
Sighs…reading back what I have written above, it sounds as though I need to be lying down on a sofa, next to a shrink. :s I sound like an imaginative, childish, lunatic who has been cooped up in the house for too long. Maybe I do have a problem and I’m not seeing it!
Geez…do I still post this up now? I guess so.
[Disclaimer: This entry does not point to one person but to the public as a whole.]
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